I always thought that I had myself covered with the best friends anyone on Earth could want. But lately I realised that I must have been delusional. People are leaving.
I've been re-assessing my friendships with my close friends lately and I realise many of them are on a very superficial basis. Who's fault? I don't know. I really don't. I feel so alone and far away from the world. I keep wondering if it is me who is keeping my distance or if these people were ever my friends to begin with.
Today two of my closest friends in school did something very mean to me and I cannot help but feel hurt. I can take their jokes though sometimes it hurts but I just try to laugh it off and pretend like its ok. But today both of them took it too far and right now I'm just feeling angry. I guess what hurts the most was that I never expected them to do such a thing to me. It would have been OK if it was an inside joke between us and only both of them laughed at me. But in front of the entire class? I felt like a fool. I would go out of my way to help these two people if they needed my help. But why the fuck should I give a damn now. They obviously don't.
I've been re-assessing my friendships with my close friends lately and I realise many of them are on a very superficial basis. Who's fault? I don't know. I really don't. I feel so alone and far away from the world. I keep wondering if it is me who is keeping my distance or if these people were ever my friends to begin with.
Today two of my closest friends in school did something very mean to me and I cannot help but feel hurt. I can take their jokes though sometimes it hurts but I just try to laugh it off and pretend like its ok. But today both of them took it too far and right now I'm just feeling angry. I guess what hurts the most was that I never expected them to do such a thing to me. It would have been OK if it was an inside joke between us and only both of them laughed at me. But in front of the entire class? I felt like a fool. I would go out of my way to help these two people if they needed my help. But why the fuck should I give a damn now. They obviously don't.
posted by Lucy | 4:08 PM
4 Comments:
at this age, especially your age, is actually the time when you realize who are your true friends.
be wise when you choose your friends. sometimes, the ones whom you think who will stand up for you when you're in trouble might be the one stabbing you from behind.
don't be afraid to eliminate those who don't deserve your friendship and kindness.
take care. (=
You're new. Who are you?
nah.
i'm not new. i'm a regular reader on your blog. i understood how you feel after reading this entry.
it sucks when the people whom you think cares about you, put you in the spotlight and makes fun of you.
take care. (=
-S-
-S- sounds damn promiscous.
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home